GS (gsmaxwell) wrote in kurt_blaine,

Fic: The one where they are all porn stars. (1/3)

 Media: Ficton
Title: The one where they are all porn stars. 1/3
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: None I think
Warnings: Cracky. Not!Cracky. One dark dub-con scene but it's part of a porn. Porn. Lots and lots of porn. 
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine, Kurt/OMC, Blaine/OMC, various other. 

Summary: Kurt hadn’t exactly thought all his years of flawless skincare and strict dieting would lead to the porn industry but sometimes the Powers that Be rolled trick dice.  
This was supposed to be crack. Filthy, porny crack. I'm truly sorry everyone. I hope you enjoy it. Hopefully I will have the next part out in a few days and I refuse to let it go past two parts. 

It was an inconspicuous building on the right side of the tracks. When Kurt had interviewed here earlier that week he had been surprised at the location. He had been certain he had written it down wrong and was about to walk into a private office building and would probably be arrested if he started his audition. But when he got off the elevator on the sixth floor he had been greeted by a very official sign. Dalton Academy wasn’t exactly his dream job but then again neither had been New Direction.

Of course, he hadn’t exactly thought all his years of flawless skincare and strict dieting would lead to the porn industry but sometimes the Powers that Be rolled trick dice.

“Kurt Hummel right?”

Kurt smiled weakly and took the hand offered to him. “That would be me.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” the man had stood from behind the receptionist desk to greet him. There was a potted plant and a fish tank beside a small row of deceptively comfortable looking chairs. The walls were wooden paneled and hand painted murals hung between the softly lit wall lamps. The entire lobby looked like old money. The only thing out of place was the shiny golden name placque on the mahogany desk. It proudly proclaimed ‘Wes, Dalton Academy Adult Films, Executive Producer.’ “David was singing your praises last week.”

Kurt nodded and kept the small smile on his face. “I’m sorry, I’m a little surprised. David told me about the council. Do you always work the front desk?”

“Ah,” Wes grinned. “We are a community at Dalton. We have the council to help with the financial side but we all chip in. The hazards of being a small business I suppose. But don’t worry, it will be easy enough to get into the swing of things. Let me call someone to take you into the studio. We have some final paperwork to still complete. You remembered your id right?”

“All of them,” Kurt grinned back at that comment. “Don’t worry, the last thing I want to do is get this place shut down for child pornography right?” Kurt chuckled at his own joke.

Wes just looked blankly at him. Kurt let the chuckle fade into a nervous cough.

“Let me just buzz someone then,” Wes reached for the phone slowly.

Someone ended up being one of the single hottest people Kurt had seen and he had spent hours of his teenager years fantasizing about Vogue. He was dressed in the Dalton costume that Kurt had noticed in the few preview clips he had watched while scouting out new agencies. He had a strong chin with a light darkness around the jaw line that hinted his age was a little older than he was supposed to be portraying. But mostly Kurt noticed his smile, small to start but growing bigger with each step.

“Hi, I’m-”

“Blaine,” Kurt blushed. “I know.“ He may have only watched a few clips but Blaine had been unforgettable. “You’re shorter than I thought you would be.”

Not exactly the words Kurt wanted out of his mouth at the moment. Wes gave him another blank look but Blaine laughed.

“We don’t exactly measure vertical height in this industry,” and Kurt couldn’t help but flick his eyes down to Blaine’s belt. The smile Blaine had changed a little and he reached out to grab Kurt’s hand. “Come on, I’ll show you the back.”


Scene: Room 201, Henderson House, Boys Dormitory.

“Blaine,” Kurt gasped. He curled into himself and closed his eyes as Blaine expertly moved his hand inside of Kurt’s open uniform pants. “Blaine.”

“Yeah,” Blaine grazed teeth over his neck and bit down gently where his loosened tie and unbuttoned collar slipped to expose his collarbone. “Come on, you’re so hot for it, aren’t you?”

Kurt could only whine in response.

“Okay, cut! Good scene guys!”

Kurt looked up dazed as Blaine pulled his hand out of Kurt’s pants (wha?) and then pulled away completely (urh, wait-). “Wow, Kurt, awesome job.” He leaned over to give him a kiss that had way more tongue than a friendly goodbye peck warranted. “I’ve got to go film another scene next door, now that I’m all prepped, but we should do coffee after.”

“Huh?” Kurt managed to vocalized. He coughed and shook his head to clear it. “Uh, yeah, that would be great.”

“Okay, I’ll see you later then!” and with that Blaine scrambled off the bed and thanked the crew with a jaunty wave as he left the room.

David sat sitting with the two-man camera crew looking over his clipboard. He was distracted as he glanced to where Kurt lay sprawled on the bed now exposed to the world. “Great Kurt. Really good work. We’ve got the fantasy sequence and now Thatcher is going to come in and see you masturbating and lend a hand.”

Kurt nodded and started to stroke himself so he wouldn’t lose the erection Blaine had easily inspired. It was definitely different than working with New Directions. His job had been mostly helping the girls with costumes and make up and providing warm up for the boys when they needed it. If he actually got any screen time it was usually hard and rough and he rarely got to come on camera. Finn was usually nice and got him off in the break room but Karofsky and the other burly straight guys never gave him a kind look on or off camera.

He did have an amazing scene with Santana, Brittany and the beast of a strap on they called Gigantor but it never made it past post-production.

“Okay, action,” David said and started to look intently on the camera screen. Kurt let his head fall back on the pillows and thrust up into his hand. A few second later, Thatcher opened the door without knocking.

It was a great scene. Thatcher was an great top and pushed all of Kurt’s buttons. His cock stroked in at the right speed and depth so he didn’t even have to fake his moans. David was a great director and managed to get the shot he needed without too much interference. It was better than most of the sex Kurt had recreationally and definitely better than the scenes he had done with New Directions.

It was great, really.

But when Thatcher was behind him, and he clutched at the pillow tucked under his chest, and gasped out encouragement and adlibbed a few curse words (which was the only point David paused the filming and told Kurt he could get into the moment and he was doing fabulously, but they were trying to build up a reputation of innocence around Kurt so be careful) all he could think about was Blaine. Blaine with dirty, filthy kisses and a hot firm hand pulling him down the constructed hallway and onto the bed.

“Thanks,” Thatcher panted beside him. “Great scene.”

“Yeah,” Kurt was also a little winded. “Great. Thank you.”

Thatcher waved a hand in acknowledgement. “I’d shake your hand but, you know.”

After a few minutes they both managed to get up and slip into the plush robes the crew had off to the side. Thatcher showed Kurt the way to the showers which were much nicer than he had expected. They were separated with small private changing areas which Kurt appreciated. Thatcher showed him where to leave his uniform to be dry cleaned and they both changed back into their street clothes.

“Have you been working here long?” Kurt asked as he started to lace up the sides of his pants.

“A few months now,” Thatcher pulled a deep green sweater over his head. “It’s been great so far. The last place I worked for was a little sleazy. Do you know Oral Intensity?”

“Isn’t that the agency that did the Passion? And it wasn’t Jesus nailed to the cross? And it was nearly shut down by that family rights group?”

“That’s the one,” Thatcher nodded. “They wanted to do the Maculate Conception and but one of the girls got attacked outside of the doors and they refused to get involved with the police. I decided to leave.”

“Wait, so are you straight?”

Thatcher shrugged. “Most guys here are.”

“I’m sorry,” Kurt was still a little shocked. “I just thought that-”

“Don’t worry about it,” Thatcher smiled amiably “It’s a common mistake.”

“With all the gay sex and everything,” Kurt laughed but Thatcher gave him a weird look and clearly Kurt was going to have to think of some new jokes.

Thatcher left with a polite good bye and Kurt found himself alone and struggling to finish the clasps on his shirt that went from his lower back to high up his neck. Mercedes had helped him into it that morning and it hadn’t been this difficult when he had taken it off. He was contorted in front of one of the mirrors when Blaine walked in wrapped in a robe that was nearly identical to the one Kurt had put in the laundry pile.

“Hey, how did your first day go?” Blaine asked brightly. “David wasn’t too bossy was he?”

“Oh, no, it went great!” Kurt dropped his hand quickly and tried to subtly smooth the shirt down from where it had bunched under his chin. “It was different from what I’m used to but good.”

“Glad to hear,” Blaine winked (winked, who winked anymore?). “Hey, I really want to hear more, can you wait for a minute? I’m going to shower then we can grab coffee, or something to eat if you’re hungry.”

“Coffee sounds nice,” Kurt tried not to look as excited as he felt but he had a sneaking suspicion he was failing miserably. “I don’t mind waiting. Take your time.”

“Thanks, I’ll just be a minute,” Blaine dropped the robe before opening the shower door and, wow, Kurt had seen him on the screen but not in the flesh and (ohmygod) it suddenly didn’t feel like he had just had a very satisfying orgasm less then thirty minutes ago.


Kurt had hoped the coffee would end horizontality. He used all his tricks. He ordered extra whip and a frappacino despite the calories and slowly licked the straw. He tilted his head down and looked through his eye lashes. He put his hand on Blaine’s and he spoke a little deeper than he usually did. He even crossed and uncrossed his legs constantly so he could brush his leather boots up Blaine’s calf and knee, making sure to press the pointed toe into Blaine’s inner thigh.

But Blaine kept smiling enthusiastically and asked question after question about Kurt’s life (sob story), his old job (horribly straight) and what he thought of Dalton (hot boys, uniforms, ties, what was there really to elaborate on?). Kurt tried to turn the tables with his own questions but Blaine managed to keep his answers vague.

“I think the thing that surprised me the most was Thatcher saying he was straight,” Kurt responded to Blaine’s inquiry. “I know that I came from a mostly straight film company but Dalton films just seemed too emotional for anyone to be faking.”

“That’s the appeal right?” Blaine took a sip from his medium drip. “Dalton is still pretty small so it has to have an angle. The council can be a little harsh to get people into their roles but they try to find people who can fit in a little naturally. Thatcher is straight but he’s a pretty genuine guy.”

“What role are you?” Kurt asked and tried for flirty but Blaine glanced into his coffee for a minute before answering.

“I think I found my role after signing on,” he replied finally. “But it’s easy to see why you got hired,” and Blaine flashed him a toothy grin.

Kurt sighed. “I look like I’m twelve. That’s a really creepy thing to be in this industry.”

“Kurt, if you don’t mind my asking,” Blaine said thoughtfully. “Why did you get into this industry? I mean, you definitely didn’t fit in at your old job, from what you’ve told me anyway.”

Kurt paused. “Well, I needed the money right. And I like sex. Isn’t every guy supposed to want to get into porn? It’s like a dream job, right?”

“Not to everyone,” Blaine said and placed his hand comfortingly on Kurt’s. Suddenly both of them realised the serious turn their conversation had taken. Kurt broke the tension and took his hand back to wave around dismissingly.

“Either way, I’ve paid off my student loans so now I’m mostly just in it for the sex,” he laughed but this time Blaine didn’t do more then give him a reassuring smile.


Kurt had a few more scenes over the next few weeks. They were mostly small things with other smaller characters. He asked Thad, the third member of the council and one of the directors of the day, what purpose they would have since they were so short.

“Don’t worry, we have a writer’s meeting next week,” Thad said as he handed Kurt a moist towelette to wipe his hand with. “It’ll be easier to explain with the whiteboard.”

The other cast members of Dalton were friendly and eager enough to talk and socialize during and after takes. However, Kurt couldn’t help but miss the chaotic nature of New Directions. His girls enjoyed being around him in a way the boys at Dalton just couldn’t copy. No one here ever asked for advice on for their make up or scenes. He loved tweaking the costumes and yelling when they ended up in tatters. He missed Tina’s dungeon gear. He missed Mercedes trying to get hot pink zebra patterns incorporated into her leather whips. He even missed Rachel and her insane commentary during scenes and her ridiculous faces. They never had a storyboard or image of what they were making besides a general theme (Ballad had been a little vague, Sexy had been widely kinky). Things had been created organically and Kurt missed it.

“Kurt, I’m going to need you to look at Derek a little more intently okay?” Today it was Wes directing. Kurt found it a little distracting that Wes always carried around a rather strangely shaped dildo when he directed. He used it like a pointer stick when he was showing how they should be blocking the scene and wrung it in his hands when he was concentrating. Now, he was pointing it tip first in Kurt’s direction.

He was on his knees with Derek’s long, cut cock in his mouth. Derek smoothed his hair back from his face so it didn’t covered his eyes as the camera crew moved in for a different angle.

“Try to look a little more nervous,” Wes advised. He brought the chocolate brown tip to his chin and tapped it thoughtfully. “Remember, you have class in a few minutes.”

They finished the scene without any more problems. Derek came all over Kurt’s face then dropped to his knees on the carpet beside Kurt and proceeded to jerk him off until he splattered over both their blazers. As soon as he could, he accepted a towel from one of the camera crew to wipe his face off. He had frantically scheduled a day at the spa with Mercedes and Tina, with whom he still lived, when he had read the script but their appointment wasn’t for a few hours.

It was his first time working with Derek, a tall, aloof boy in his mid twenties that Kurt had trouble believing in a school uniform, so when they walked back to the changing room together the conversation was light.

There were a few rooms set up on the sixth floor. Kurt still didn’t understand how they managed to zone the building for the type of films they produced but Blaine had assured him Westervelt had an inclusive bylaw towards all types of theatrical arts. Kurt and Derek had been filming in the hallway room which included a sturdy bookshelf they had been half hidden behind. There was also the generic dorm room that Kurt had filmed in on his first day, the senior commons with a grand piano, a few specialized rooms Kurt had yet to see, and an empty classroom. Some times the doors would be open for filming so they had been told to speak quietly when walking from room to room.

As they approached the door to the empty classroom, the noises in the hallway made it obvious it was in use. Derek and Kurt quieted as they got close and Kurt glanced in curiously.

It was the first time he had seen Blaine in a scene since their first day. He was pressed against the heavy desk on one side of the room. His blazer had been cast off but his tie still hung loosely around his neck. His shirt was mostly unbuttoned and his pants and underwear were only hastily shoved down to his knees. Behind him, a man, who looked to be in his mid-thirties, was dressed in a tweed jacket and fisted his own cock against Blaine‘s oxford shirt. His other hand was pressed down between Blaine’s shoulders keeping him pinned and his cheek pressed flat against some loose papers. Kurt could see as the man moved the hand holding his cock downward and slowly started to press into Blaine. Blaine’s eyes went wide and his breath came in short, frantic gasps.

“Do you like that?” the man, obviously playing a teacher’s role of some sort, growled and rotated his hips, not going any deeper. “Answer me.”

“N-no,” Blaine’s voice cracked and Kurt could suddenly see the tear tracks on his face. Derek grabbed Kurt’s arm before he could rush in.


Kurt didn’t managed to see Blaine until the next day. He had to leave to meet Tina and Mercedes before Blaine’s scene was done and he couldn’t even explain to them why he was so distracted. It wasn’t like the two dominatrices were unused to safe words or ambiguous sexual scenes. He just couldn’t find the words, not until he saw Blaine again.

He arrived a little early bearing a medium drip for Blaine. Today they were all gathering for the monthly writer’s meeting. Kurt had not yet been to one but Blaine had told him they were pretty boring but mandatory. When he arrived, only half of the cast and crew were in the classroom set. It was the only room big enough to accommodate them all. Blaine was all ready seated in a desk near the front and he smiled gratefully when Kurt handed him his coffee.

“You’re a lifesaver,” Blaine took the lid off to inhale the smell.

“You look a little tired,” Kurt said. He was trying to not pry but he couldn’t help glancing at the teacher’s desk sitting directly in front of them with a weary eye. “Did you sleep last night?”

“Late night phone call with my sister,” he replied and Kurt relaxed a little. “She’s studying abroad and the time difference is crap.”

They talked a little about Blaine’s sister until the rest of the cast trickled in. Thatcher gave him a wave as he took a seat near the back. Thad, David and Wes had pulled three of the chairs to the teacher desk. There was a giant whiteboard as promised off to the side. Kurt decided violently that he could never sit at that desk even if he cleaned it himself with bleach.

“Warblers, come to order please,” Kurt was grateful Wes had traded his usual prop for a wooden gavel. He wasn’t sure he could have sat through a meeting had the brown dildo been directing the proceedings. “Thank you. David, you can start taking the meeting minutes. Thad, what is our first business of the day?”

Kurt looked at Blaine and raised an eyebrow. Blaine just grinned back and took a sip from his coffee as if to say ‘Didn’t the crazy brown dildo tip you off to the shenanigans that go down here?’

“First business,” Thad started. “We want to thank everyone for their great effort in helping our new cast member settle in smoothly. We want to finally and formally welcome you to the Dalton Academy Warblers, Kurt.” There was a spatter of polite applause and Kurt smiled and nodded his head in an awkward thanks.

“Second order of business,” Thad moved on smoothly. “We have finished post-production on Dalton Academy, The Gargling Warblers, XXIX Edition.”

Kurt looked at Blaine curiously. He had known they were making a film rather than a series of shorts but it was the first time he had heard the title. Blaine leaned over and whispered, “It’s part of a long, long series.”

“And now that we have finally cast our Kurt character, we have started preliminary filming of our special edition.”

At this several members of the crew gasped and started to whisper frantically.

“Order,” Wes banged his gavel. “Settled everyone. We’ve been planning for a long time now but we have started filming some of the smaller scenes thanks to Kurt here for the last few weeks. But to make it official, I will state for the record that we are now in the process of creating Dalton Academy, The Gargling Warblers, the XXX Edition.”

There was a much stronger applause and a few people sitting around Kurt reached over to pat him on the shoulder. Kurt shot another look at Blaine and once against Blaine just took another sip of his coffee then mouthed a quick later.

The meeting ended soon enough with a thick folder of papers about the new film which Wes told them to review as soon as possible. The room was buzzed with excitement but Blaine made sure he stuck close to Kurt as they made their way out through the crowd of people trying to clap him on the back and shake his hand.

Neither had scenes that day so they decided to take Blaine’s car to the nearby coffee shop Kurt had gotten their earlier drinks at. Blaine ordered another coffee, which Kurt teased him about, and a more complete breakfast.

“I missed food this morning,” Blaine enthusiastically began to eat the bacon and egg sandwich.

Kurt snorted. Over the past few weeks he had learned Blaine missed breakfast most mornings. “I’ve been patient, now, tell me the big deal about this new film. Besides the roman numerals.”

“That’s pretty much the big deal,” Blaine laughed. “You know Dalton Academy has been around for a while, right? The Gargling Warblers is a just a series of it. From what I’ve heard though, the franchise hasn’t been doing too well. The council thinks it might be because of our clean image.”

“Blaine, we are porn stars.”

“I meant comparatively,” Blaine made a face at him. “Ohio has a national porn contest every year and the competition is pretty stiff. No pun intended,” Blaine added and Kurt groaned. “Vocal Adrenaline Studio is a machine. They roll out top selling films all the time. And Oral Intensity has had a fantastic fiscal year due to the controversy. Even New Directions is strong. I don’t think anyone expected a studio that can’t decided what market to target to do so well.”

“I remember Shue was pretty disappointed when I left,” Kurt shrugged. “I figured it was because he could get away with paying me dirt. Or the free blowjobs. But I suppose it could have been the diversity.”

“Wes, David and Thad have come up with a new script to blow the minds of Ohio. No pun intended.”

“I’m not sure you mean that anymore.”

“A gay film has never won in Ohio but the council is pretty determined this year. They’ve come up with some pretty intense stuff. They were really happy you came along when you did,” Blaine smiled and suddenly Kurt felt bad about his earlier nostalgia. New Directions may have nurtured his pay check and earned him great friends but he had never felt like he had be vital.

“What’s so special about me?”

Blaine looked down at his coffee then looked back up and quirked a small grin, different from his usually broad ones. “Well, XXIX was a bit of a dark film. XXX is going to be a redemption.”

“Redemption? How?”

“I’ll get you a copy of XXIX. Then, it should be pretty clear I think.”

Blaine looked a little troubled which was unusual and Kurt didn’t really like it. He leaned over and laid a lace gloved hand on Blaine’s wrist. “Don’t worry, I’ve been in Tina’s dungeon with Santana and Gigantor. Dark is something I can do.”

Tags: genre: humor, genre: romance, media: fanfic, rating: nc-17

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